Well, We Asked

We asked you what concrete action you will take this year to fight fascism. Not all of you took us seriously. Here are some of your answers:

• I will phone-bank before the midterm election to increase voter turnout. 
• I started donating $10 a month to an organization in my community that supports trans youths. 
• I will kick their fucking fascist ass at Mario Kart
• I got involved with my local mutual aid group. 
• I am putting Coexist bumper stickers on cop cars. 
• I bought a bidet, but it doesn’t work because the troll hiding in my sweet cheeks keeps blocking all of the water. 
• I started going to city council meetings and emailing my local representatives. I live in a small town, so I feel a real ability for my voice to be heard. And I think it is probably helpful to have someone show up who isn’t screaming about made-up propaganda. 
  
• Donkey Bong
• Is this new season of Bridgerton less horny? Or am I more horny? And my hunger can’t be slaked? 
• I’m learning how to de-escalate conversations with my conservative family members so I can counter the false talking points they see on the internet without starting a fight that will only push them further to the right.
  
• If I carry my groceries home in a compostable bag, does that count as a taco? A wrap?
• Have you heard the Radiohead Song “True Love Waits?” My high school girlfriend and I just got back together. We’re in our thirties now. Almost twenty years since we broke up. We watched Twilight: New Moon tonight. I don’t remember why. The movie was okay, but I had a great time. These last four months have been the best of my life. Erika and I really belong together. And I am so grateful God has put her back into my life. As the movie was coming to an end, I thought, “How great would it be if ‘True Love Waits’ plays over the credits.” It didn’t. But I didn’t mind. Because Erika was there. I don’t need anything else. I’m a little drunk. 
  
• Do you remember Boaty McBoatface? Well we're married now. Three kids. It's lovely.
• Dildo Candelabra