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Summer 2022

Community Postings

From: Samantha J. 
To: Hungry Foodies

Would you like some guacamole? It’s my mom’s recipe. You know her secret ingredient? She replaces the onions with cake. $30

***

From: Jo R.
To: Joe T.

Your mother was right about you! You are 187 centimeters tall. Such a precise woman. 

***

From: Green Grass Grocers in Yahoo
To: Lovers of books and veggies

Nostalgic for Borders? We’re just like it but smaller and we sell vegetables. 

***

From: Steve’s Scarecrow Warehouse
To: People*

Life hack! Scarecrows scare roommates, too!

*More specifically: People looking to keep roommates from snooping through your closet while you are spending the weekend house-sitting for your friend Stevie and her weird, rich husband. 

***

From: Debra S. 
To: Elizabeth Z. 

I know that when you say, "That's so European," you mean, "Why can't you cook one fucking thing without olives?" I like olives. So sue me. If you don’t like it, then go fuck a fork.

***

From: Mom
To: My lovely children

I'm not angry. And I'm not disappointed either. I'm just hungry, tired, and a medium amount of horny.

***

From: You know who!
To: My fucking sister!

"If you've got it, flaunt it" doesn't apply when you are using MY roasted apples.

***

From: Rosie
To: Tristan and Guy

If you don’t cut out all that racket-ball, I'm going to squash you!
That’s a joke, but you do need to stop playing racquetball so loud in the den. Some of us are trying to record an audiobook. 

***

From: Stephanie
To: Rhiannon 

Carrots are not snacks. I mean, they are snacks, but you can’t invite me over for snacks and then toss me a bag of baby carrots. Please reach out and let me know what you plan to do to make this situation right. 

***

From: Hank G.
To: Scientists

Did you know there is a school called Rice? You learn something new every day. That's a food word!

***

From: David C.
To: Paul B.

It's always “grotesque display of wealth” this and “grotesque display of wealth” that. But is that such a bad thing? I know you are a Marxist, but you're also always talking about body horror. I'm just saying it's mixed messages.

***

Upcoming events 
Monthly Roundtable Discussions (Second Tuesday at 8pm):
What's Good for the Goose is Goof for the Laughter: A taxonomy of funny looking birds (September)
Ignorance is Chris: We all get together to teach Chris a thing or two [In a good way! Chris is 100% onboard] (October)
Well That's a Damned Train: Learn the difference between trains and really long trucks (November)

Cinematic Feasts: A Harvest Celebration of Food Movies
September 17th: Tampopo
October 1st: Fresh Kill
October 15th: Julie & Julia
October 29th: Volver
November 12th: Night of the Living Dead 

If you would like someone to let you know when a new edition of the East Nebraska Secret Commune Social Quarterly is available, click here and we can help you out.
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  • Home
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    • Creative Possum Names
    • The Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Regional News You Might Have Missed
    • A Zine/Challenge
    • Found Fiction
  • Summer 2022
    • General News
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    • Instructions for a Good Time
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    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Poems
    • Dating App Pics
    • Editorial: On the Fourth of July
  • Spring 2022
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    • Editorial: On Arming Teachers and Watching Movies
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    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Well, We Asked
    • Poems
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  • Winter 2022
    • General News
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    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Poems
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    • A Quick Questions
  • Fall 2021
    • General News
    • Community Postings
    • Poems
    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Halloween Stories for Pacifists
    • How to Avoid Talking about Sports
    • Icebreaker Questions
    • Regional News
  • Summer 2021
    • General News
    • Community Postings
    • Poems
    • Apologies
    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Regional News You Might Have Missed
    • New Rules for the Monthly Open Mics
    • A Recipe for Fruit Pizza that Can Save a Relationship
  • About
  • Home
  • Fall 2022
    • General News
    • Community Postings
    • Poems
    • Creative Possum Names
    • The Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Regional News You Might Have Missed
    • A Zine/Challenge
    • Found Fiction
  • Summer 2022
    • General News
    • Community Postings
    • Instructions for a Good Time
    • Regional News You Might Have Missed
    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Poems
    • Dating App Pics
    • Editorial: On the Fourth of July
  • Spring 2022
    • General News - Spring 2022
    • Community Postings
    • Editorial: On Arming Teachers and Watching Movies
    • Regional News You Might Have Missed
    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Well, We Asked
    • Poems
    • Social Skills for Young Children
  • Winter 2022
    • General News
    • Community Postings
    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Poems
    • Regional News You Might Have Missed
    • Style Tips
    • On New Years and New Resolutions
    • Children's Corner
    • A Quick Questions
  • Fall 2021
    • General News
    • Community Postings
    • Poems
    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Halloween Stories for Pacifists
    • How to Avoid Talking about Sports
    • Icebreaker Questions
    • Regional News
  • Summer 2021
    • General News
    • Community Postings
    • Poems
    • Apologies
    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Regional News You Might Have Missed
    • New Rules for the Monthly Open Mics
    • A Recipe for Fruit Pizza that Can Save a Relationship
  • About