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This Shouldn't
Have Happened

Whitney cleared her throat and asked about the pictures as nicely as she could. The driver was clearly excited to field the question and started down her well-rehearsed explanation. 
    “Well,” she started, “did you know that many of the nations we think of as power-houses shaping the world are inventions of modernity? The Italy we know didn’t exist until the 1860s. Same for Germany, but the 1870s. Pretty wild to think about, huh?”
    Whitney nodded in timid agreement. 
    “And what the lines on maps don’t tell you is that all these countries were made up of regional governments ruled over by their own hereditary leaders. Kings, counts, dukes, there was a whole system, right? And who got to decide who held those positions?
    Whitney shrugged, genuinely unsure. 
    “God. He knows every last one of us, so who better to know what every city and state and town needs.” 
    Given one hundred guesses, Whitney never would have guessed that this would be the answer to her question. She started to wonder whether the driver had heard her at all or was just saying whatever she wanted. 
    “But now, in our secular age, we have replaced these kings with scavengers; scraping up donations that corrupt their soul and promising people whatever they want to hear. And as a response, we have stopped looking up to politicians. And, you know…thank goodness. 
    “But our God is a powerful God. And he doesn’t give up on us, even when we do our darndest to undermine his will. That is why God has given us new stars in the sky to offer us direction. Do you see what I mean?”
    “So the stars are stars? Like celebrity stars?”
    “See? The whole thing fits together so perfectly. Our God is a powerful God, but our God is also an elegant God. I bet that’s why he had us call them both ‘stars.’”
    Whitney thought about it for a second. She was still a little confused and wasn’t sure whether it was worth diving deeper down this rabbit-hole. But, knowing that she was going to tell and retell this anecdote for weeks, decided to develop the story a little further. She asked, “So, you think that celebrities should be in charge? Like kings?”
    “Now, that’s where secular history classes have let you down. Kings were never really in charge. Just like the president isn’t in charge now. You can tell people what to do all you want, but they’re gonna do what they want to do. Unless there is a police officer right in front of you threatening to beat you up or shoot you or throw you in a hole or something, you are making those choices. So then the question is…what type of person do you want to be?”
    The driver offered Whitney a card with information about weekly meetings in the basement of some Catholic church in Ralston. At the top, she saw the name of this new movement: THE SERVANTS TO A NEW KINGDOM. 
    “So, why are you guys called The Servants To A New Kingdom?”
    “I don’t know, why is it called Panera? I guess it sounded nice.”
    “I was just asking because of the acronym.”
    “Look, I know it spells STANK. Ha ha. Very funny. I hear that twenty times a day. Get over yourself.” 
    “I guess I meant The STAN Kingdom. Like the Eminem song.”
    “I don’t know, I don’t really listen to Eminem. I know God made him famous, and there must be some reason for that, but I find him kinda angry and misogynistic.”
    Whitney fought the urge to clarify that she didn’t really like Eminem either. She was getting the sense that she had gone about as far in this conversation she could as a tourist. Any further questions would require an investment in this worldview she wasn’t willing to give. She had enough on her plate as it was. Luckily, she was getting close to her destination.  
    Once at the high school, Whitney stepped out into a parking lot full of families and music and people walking around with hot dogs. The football game was starting. Standing there, surrounded and unnoticed, she felt both invisible and unable to hide. 


Should Whitney: 
  • Go to the football game
  • Look through the cars
  • Use Find my Friends to find Dillon’s current location

Copyright © 2015
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  • This Shouldn't Have Happened
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    • Do You Poke Smot?
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    • September 30th, 2023
    • Pictures of the Ground
  • Winter 2024 (Letters)
    • A Form Letter for Newspapers
    • A Form Letter for Art Museums
    • A Form Letter for Film Critics
    • A Form Letter for College Professors
    • Horny Copypasta to Text People on Arbor Day
    • 20 Wonderful Messages to Write Inside a Card
  • Fall 2023 (Poetry)
    • Adrianne Lenker from the band Big Thief visits Nebraska for the Maha Music Festival
    • Three Poems That Were Written on the Same Day
    • The Silver Dollar Flapjacks of Poetry
    • Regular and Irregular Meter
    • A Question
    • Business Poetry
    • Regional News Formatted Poetically
    • The Mental Health Awareness Decade
    • A Text Exchange in Which a Secret is Revealed
    • Maybe the Closest I Have Come to Writing a Perfect Poem
    • Three Poems
    • A Series of Thoughts I Had While Watching All That Jazz
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    • Romantic Texts to Send Anyone at Any Time
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    • A Letter from the Secluded Sisters of the Missouri Valley
    • Regional News You Might Have Missed
    • New Rules for the Monthly Open Mics
    • A Recipe for Fruit Pizza that Can Save a Relationship
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